I realized after my post yesterday, that there is a wayyyyyy more prominent feeling that we avoid on the regular. I hate feeling TIRED. Tired can be an emotion, think worn out or stagnant, or a bodily sensation of not getting enough sleep.
Coffee. Energy drinks. Phone scrolling. Binge watching. Constantly buzzing around staying insanely busy. Packing our schedules to the brim. They all actually reinforce the tiredness and only offer temporary solace. More on all of that another day.
For today, I’m curious about why. Why do I hate feeling tired? Sleep is a physiological need and we all know we need an adequate amount. Yet, when we are tired we are like “Shut up body, we aren’t tired. Here’s another coffee just the way we like it. Yummm. Now, we march on to do all the things.” Really though, being tired is uncomfortable. Low energy, super irritable, no fun.
When looking at the bodily sensation of tired, I have a hunch it has to do with how inconvenient it is to actually get the right amount of sleep we need. If I need more sleep, then that means I have less hours in the day for all the other stuff I need to get done. Lately, it seems like I don’t have enough hours to begin with. If I don’t get all my stuff done, I will look lazy, my house will be messy, my boss will be mad(…well I don’t have a boss, but you get the idea), my family will wonder what the heck happened…. And on and on and on.
On the emotional side of tired, that feeling of just being done, worn out, or stuck and stagnant, it points to a lack of taking personal responsibility for our situation.
Do you see what happened there? We hear it every day. I am so tired. So often that we think it’s normal. We prioritize doing 100 other things over getting enough sleep or doing what is necessary to change our position. This isn’t new information. But still the question is why?
Looking back at those last few paragraphs, I see a couple major themes. One is caring what other people think. Putting other people’s opinion of us above are actually health. Something doesn’t seem right with that one. The other is not taking personal responsibility. Eeeek. That is also a hard pill to swallow. You mean I am personally responsible for my circumstances? No thanks, I’ll scroll my phone some more thank you very much. (Just kidding. Personal responsibility is my jam. It has changed my life.)
So my practice this week is to stop caring what other people think and just do what I need to do to take care of my self. Even if that means dishes in the sink, phone calls left unreturned, and not volunteering for the Book Fair.
What is your practice this week? How can you stop avoiding tired? How can you lean in to the tired feeling as a message of a change that needs to happen? Is it a strict bedtime? Is it getting started on that fun side project you have been looking forward to but putting off to get creative energy flowing again? I would love to hear it.
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